How to Help Your Children if They see Spirits

How to Help Your Children if They see Spirits

Mommy………daddy….there is a man in my room! 

Apart from the disruption in sleep, the words above screamed at you in between sobs can make most parents want to run away and hide probably from both the Spirits as well as their children. First of all, it is tricky to explain to your little ones what they are experiencing if you are not very interested or aware of spirits. It is the same feeling I get when I am asked to calculate big numbers! Part of it is having to explain something you don’t fully understand but also it is incredibly difficult to see your little one feeling so scared about something you can’t see or feel.  Parents have a natural instinct to protect their children and when they can’t, it feels like your hands are tied and it is frustrating.

As someone who suffered tremendously as a child with spiritual experiences and learned to deal with it on my own, I have been thinking of writing this post and a possible e-book for a long time but as usual I get side tracked and never got around it. But Spirit have ways to get me to do things! I had several clients who came to see asking about the very same topic – all having children who see spirits and don’t know what to do to help them, messages from friends and some former clients. So despite having a hundred and one things to do today, I was pulled to the laptop and the words are flowing as we speak. 

First thing you need to understand is that we are all born intuitive and the ability to see spirit. As we grow older and as the mind analyses everything and our thoughts are influenced by our upbringing or our own opinions, some of us “forget” that part of our self.  The second most important point is that spirits mean no harm. It is our fear of them or the unknown that makes us “feel” the negative energy.

The most common visits are from family in Spirit. Grandparents, parents or anyone related to the child will want to visit and if possible, communicate their love. Of course not all of them know how to and children may only be able to see shadows which in the dark looks scary.

It is not uncommon for strangers who may have lived in the house before your family moved in or on the plot of land the house was built on, come for a little look. Put yourself in their position and ask yourself, wouldn’t you do the same? Would you not visit your grandchild after you passed? Or come by to see the house you had the best memories in? The answer is a big YES!  

Children have more spiritual experiences than psychic at the beginning as it takes time for them to fully understand and flex their psychic ability while being able to see or feel Spirit is easier as they have no preconceived notions, prejudice or fear – you can say this is an open door for spiritual experiences. If they are meant to be spiritually connected throughout their lives then this will continue and they will attract mentors and helpers to develop their abilities.

The challenge is their reaction to a Spirit visit. Fear comes naturally as when the lights are out and they see a shadow or a person standing in their bedroom who is not someone they recognise. Children have a natural curiosity and will want to know more – who, why and what. Others will be shaken to the core because they KNOW that they are seeing Spirit or something they can’t fully understand.

Why did I write this? I KNOW how it feels! I learned from my own experiences and want to help the new generation of children to be more comfortable with the Spiritual world. I spent a long time fearing and thinking Spirits were evil and scary. But I know better now and I fully appreciate every moment I spent working with Spirit. 

I had spirits visiting me from a very young age but it was only when I was 10 when I realised that the people I was seeing were actually spirits. It scared me and I wasn’t very comfortable because I couldn’t understand their presence and the feelings that would come with it. For example a cold spot on my arm, goosebumps or sensing their death or hearing a message – it all freaked me out. Of course now a medium, this is all normal and I don’t feel negativity at all when I am near spirit. But as a child it was scary, intrusive and really affected my life in ways I cannot even begin to explain.

For many years I slept with the lights on and in fact always had the light on in hotel rooms or when I was alone in the house, I hated the dark, I had nightmares, disturbed sleep, felt misunderstood, and thought I was a misfit.

My parents tried everything to help me and my dad would often get to sleep really late as he would stay up in case I had a nightmare or an experience whereby I would start screaming in the night. It would take ages for them to calm me down and for me to go back to sleep. My mother would pray for me and sing devotional songs to make me feel better. I remember seeing several mediums and medicine men to help me but nothing helped. I had all sorts of charms and protective things around my bed and in my pillow to help but it just went on for years. I also suffered from sleep paralysis for a long time and I don’t have to tell you how absolutely terrifying an experience it was for me as a child. I mistakenly thought I was being attacked by spirits and that added to my fear.

So what have I learned from my own experiences? And what advise can I give to parents? Here is my essential list on how you can help your children:

  • First of all, it is important to have an open dialogue with your young ones. Try to understand what they are seeing. Write it down in a book with a date and time of when they wake up.
  • Look back at what you have written down later that day. Try to understand what your child experienced that night. For example:  Tim said he saw a tall man wearing a hat, standing next to the wardrobe. He had a cane and was reaching out for Tim.  Now if you look at this information – you have information about a spirit contact – tall man who lived in an era where men wore hats and possibly dressed in a suit. Now think about someone in spirit who matches that description on both  you and your partner’s side of the family. Was Is it a grandfather or great grandfather? Ask family members and maybe have a look at an old photo album. You may well find a photo that links to the Spirit contact. Allow your child to view the photo and explain who this person was, if possible describe their character. Now from Tim’s description it sounds like the spirit contact merely wanted to say hello and was reaching out with affection. Explain to the child that sometimes, when someone passes into the light, they do come back to say hello and to show love.  Take the fear and negativity out of that experience so that all that remains is LOVE and the child is now able to enjoy the experience. 
  • You can also teach your children to speak to the spirit contact. They can also be taught to say something simple like “thank you for visiting but I want to sleep now” so that sets a sort of boundary that Spirit will respect.
  • If your children are a little older and able to write, give them a journal, help them decorate it and call it their “spiritual journal” or whatever you both would like to call it. Guide them to write down their experiences. There may even be messages from spirit but also from their own intuition.
  • Guide them to “humanise” the spirit contact. I know it sounds weird but by teaching them to have a conversation with the Spirit, it almost makes it a more normal experience.  They can ask “what is your name? “who are you” “Do you know my parents? “where do you live? So this allows the fear to take second place.  You will find that they will get more curious and be able to talk about it without any fear.
  • You can clear the energy in their room by smudging the house and areas where they see the spirit contact with white sage. I always have a lighted candle on a clean plate and a shell for my sage to rest on as I walk around the house. You can say “whoever who is visiting, please go to the light. We politely ask you to leave this space”
  • Sensitive children can also feel the pain of the spirit contact’s passing or even their emotions. For example if a grandchild was born after a grandmother has passed, she may feel great sadness at not being alive for the birth and being able to physically hold that child. Spirits sometimes miss their “physical” life and it can seem sad. Some children will feel it more than others. It is up the parents to understand and explain this to the children as they grow older.
  • The most important thing parents can do is to try to understand what their children are going through and not dismiss their experiences as “nonsense” or “rubbish” or worse still blame it on their over active imagination. It is very frustrating for children who can’t express themselves clearly to be told what they are experiencing is not important!
  • The best way to help someone is to understand what the other person is going through. Read up about how mediumship, spiritual experiences and how the different gifts work. There is plenty of free information on the Internet and books you can read.
  • Get support – you can take them to your local spiritual church. They will be able to give both you and your child important insights and recommend useful books and reading material. Almost all Spiritual Churches have a development circle where people can learn the basics, attend every week to expand their knowledge and experience with Spirit. I am not entirely sure if they do work with children but I have seen teenagers attend. This is something to consider if you feel your child has an interest in developing spiritually.
  • Go see an experienced and knowledgeable medium either with your child or on your own to get better insight into how it all works.
  • Don’t doubt your children if they say they see spirits. This is a guarantee that they will suffer from insecurities and feel misunderstood. The most important thing you can do is to LISTEN and acknowledge what they are going through.
  • Just remember that most of the time Spirit people show themselves because they are truly desperate to be acknowledged. They want to reach out and they want to communicate. The more your explain what the child is experiencing, the more they will be comfortable and relaxed. But to do this, you the parent need to be comfortable with THEIR experiences.

Finally as the parent you need to make the effort to take the fear out of the experience and perhaps also be open to learning more about the spirit world. Understand that they come in contact with us to say hello and to reach out. They don’t mean us any harm but then you have to realise that not all spirits are the same. Some can be a little too eager than others which means they aren’t familiar with their communication skills and then to give out the wrong message or be a little clumsy. 

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me if you have any questions or would like me to support your child in their development. 

I love feedback so please feel free to leave me a comment and let me know if this was useful to you.

 

January Full Moon 2016

Have you been outside to look at the drama that has been playing out on our skies this evening? Dark, mysterious and stunning. That is the energy that is around us at the moment. Used correctly, it can manifest our dreams otherwise, it will bring out some dark feelings. The best way to work with this energy is to do your wishlist a little different this time. Instead of putting all the things you think you need……. write down what you want to let go. For example if you are single, you would have put down “I want to meet a man” (some would add, status, health, looks etc) but what you may need to let go is “the fear of being alone”. I know it sounds unrelated but this may be really the real stumbling block to finding the right person and ultimately,to your happiness. We may be making decisions based on these core issues which run continuously in the background without our knowledge.
 
Or if you are hoping for a better financial situation, you are likely to write “I want to win the lottery”. First of all, the lottery is chance so even in psychic readings, a true professional will never predict or provide numbers or combinations. We all know the odds of winning the lottery is terrible so in a away we are asking the universe for something that way well be impossible. But getting back to the wishlist, you could choose to “let go bad financial decisions” which in some if not most cases (talking about myself!) the root of the problem. By letting that go, we are giving ourselves the freedom and telling the universe, we are ready for a better financial situation.
 
Think about what you want/need and let your mind wander to what you need to let go. Don’t over think it….just write down whatever that drops into your mind. You will be surprised. Don’t worry if it doesn’t work the first time and your mind brings up things like how many eggs you have in the fridge etc. Letting go takes time and our body and our mind is trained to resist it.
Pay attention to your dreams, especially the ones where you have a conversation with someone. Keep a notepad next to your bed and keep your eyes closed for a second and let your mind wander back to the dream to “catch” it. Write down everything you remember. Also keep an eye out for numbers.  Such a relevant message for me as I embark on a new but not unfamiliar journey.
 
My guide for the moon rituals is on here. As usual don’t worry if you can’t burn your wishlist or if you can’t do it today. Put your wishlist near a window where the moon rays is likely to wash it with its energy. You can put it inside a clean box and leave it at a safe place. You can also do the ritual one or two days before or after the new/full moon. All this is a GUIDE and not a rule. 
 
My camera is playing up so would love to see your photos of tonight’s moon. Also you know I love feedback so let me know if the exercise above helped.
Lots of love x Angela

Speaking to my father

I was asked to contribute to an article on talking to parents after death. I decided to do this because it was something I do and believe in. In the days before I fully embraced my mediumship, I spoke to my dad to help me heal my grief. I was in such a difficult place emotionally and I was struggling with the situation I found myself in. Trying to deal with the death of someone who had such a strong and definite influence in my life was difficult. People like that leave a huge void. My father was no saint but he was also my saviour in many ways. So I would speak to him in my mind, sometimes ask for answers before going to sleep or even during meditation. I remember very clearly the very first time I was umming and ahing about going to the Arthur Findlay Spiritual college. It was a huge decision for me. The cost was one thing but to dedicate 7 days to try to understand my spirituality and mediumship was a big commitment. The fear that I would go all the way there and find out I wasn’t gifted in anyway was massive. I wanted to go but then I didn’t feel I was good enough. The course was on the Saturday but on Thursday night I was still undecided and hadn’t booked. That night I asked my father — should I go? Is this what I should be doing? I went to bed with more questions than answers. In my dream, my father came into the house and sat down on the dining table. I was sat there with lots of different brochures and leaflets. He sat there with his favourite whisky, speaking to me.. debating the pros and cons. As I was waking up, I heard myself say “go to Arthur Findlay College”. I knew that was the answer to my question the night before. Of course as a skeptic I thought well it was probably my imagination but as I lay there feeling this message, I felt my father’s presence and I had a deep sense of knowing of the details of the dream. I said to myself, well its probably too late anyway as AFC is very international and courses and the rooms tend to be fully booked months in advanced so what chance would I have less than 24 hours before the day? I called them anyway expecting to be rejected and guess what…..they had ONE room left. Someone cancelled their booking so I could take their place ! I have never doubted his support and his messages since that day. He is very much my influence and inspiration in my wonderful journey. It is very apt that this article appears on NYE and on the day I remember him the most.

I would like to comment on the headline which is a tad misleading. I don’t think any of us insisted that our relationship is better now than when they were alive. My case is a little different as a Medium, I can send and receive messages from the Spirit world so yes I have been given knowledge about my father and why he was the way he was, which has allowed me to get past his flaws and there is no longer that barrier which was here in the physical world.Apart from speaking and communicating with him, I also get signs and visits from him. I am humbled and grateful that I do as its been a very important part of my journey so far.

The article does not highlight the fact that I am a Medium and I believe that was meant to be. I would prefer people see the story for what it is — a relationship between a daughter and her father rather than a medium and a contact.

I do hope that anyone reading this today will find some comfort from all of us who shared our stories. I could barely speak to the journalist during the interview as I was so choked up.

Daily Mail article 31/12/15

Daily Mail article 31/12/15

You can read the full article here: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3379647/The-women-talk-dead-parents-day-insist-relationship-s-better-alive.html#comments

Getting the most out of 2016

Getting the most out of 2016

Hope everyone had a lovely Christmas with family and getting ready to usher in 2016 in style. I can’t wait to be counting down and sharing a toast with friends tomorrow night. 2015 has been a really full on year with a lot of highs but with some small lows as well. But such is life isn’t it?  For me, its a balance of both, take the learning lessons from the lows and appreciate the highs. It has been an amazing year of awakening, clarity and guidance for me. I have been so humbled by the wonderful spiritual gifts and new doors opened for me this year. Its been full of lovely people, experiences, learnings, teachings and even travel. I can’t wait for the wonderful things coming to me next year and lots of things are in motion as we speak.

I have had many messages asking for guidance on how to prepare for 2016.  I love messages and sharing my insight so please don’t hesitate to send me a message for ideas for my blog.

Spiritual guidance on preparing for 2016

There is two aspects to this. It is a good idea to get your house ready for the new year. I want to share with you something my mother used to tell me. First of all, as you may know, I grew up in Malaysia and my parents were of mixed religion – Roman Catholic and Hindu. I have relatives who are Buddhist, Muslim, atheist, Baptist and Sikh. So a sort of United Nations of religion and race.  I never knew where religion started and tradition ended when it came to our rituals back when I was growing up. My mother would insist that we clean up the house, the patio and garden a few days before Christmas. We would clean the house, throw or give away unwanted things. My mother would also heat up charcoal pieces on the stove and place them in a small stoneware burner. Fankincense resin would then be thrown on to the charcoal. This would result in an explosion of beautiful scented smoke which would fill the air all around. Till this day I love the smell of frankincense and even have incense which I used in my therapy room.

My mother told me it was to cleanse the house and get it ready for Mahalakshmi the deity of wealth. A clean and bright house would attract the deity to bless it with good luck and fortune. 

Mahalakshmi

Mahalakshmi – Hindu Goddess of wealth, fortune, and prosperity (both material and spiritual).

This concept of cleaning and clearing stuck with me. In fact its instinct that I reach for the vacuum cleaner  a few days before a full moon or a special day.  Here are some of the things you can do to create a welcoming house for the universe! 

Shout out to the Universe that you are ready for abundance and 2016! 

Preparing your home:

1. Clean and declutter – get the house tidy and ready. Give away unwanted clothes and shoes. You don’t need the clutter and you will need the space for the new year. 

2. Sage – Do this tonight or on the 31st or 1st. Make sure you turn the smoke alarm off while you do it and turn it on a few hours after the smoke has settled down. I used an old clean plate to hold my sage, a candle and a medium sized shell to rest the lighted sage. The candle is useful as the sage tends to burn out .  I found lighters uncomfortable to keep lighted. You can use the candle flame to relight the sage as you go around the rooms.  I used good quality white Californian sage sticks. 

3. Prayer: As you start off, ask Archangel Michael to ground you and to surround you with his cloak of light. Do this before you start smudging the house. You can say anything you want but this is a powerful prayer I wrote a while ago which a number of people have come back to say has helped. Prayer for Life 

Preparing You:

1. How can you invite anyone or anything into your life if its full? Take a look at the dramas in your life, who instigated them and why it happened. Is there a learning lesson somewhere? What can you do about it in 2016? Can you change the way you dealt with situations or do you need to just stop letting people into your life who abuse your kindness?  One thing you would want to avoid though is posting negative posts on social media. There are plenty of those “I am going to have genuine friends” ,”get rid of my negative friends”quotes floating around in social media at the moment.  I feel these generate negativity both for yourself and the people who read it. Deal with things in private and directly.  No need to tell all your 300 or more friends that you are doing a FB cull. Why cause so much hurt for something that doesn’t concern them? I say this from experience so don’t think I am saying it for the sake of saying it. I learned from it and so can you. Negativity is like fat (I should know!). So easy to get but so hard to get rid off! Negativity gets stuck in your mind, your body and in the spiritual layer. I see a lot of this when I do my healing work. It can manifest in a physical as well as mental manner. Stop absorbing negativity so you can welcome more positivity in your life.

2. Meditate – I know its a busy few days for all us but take a minute or two to meditate. You only need earphones and some meditation music or guided meditation so you could do it on a train, before you go to sleep or even in the living room. Obviously don’t do it while cooking or driving. There may be some guidance or clarity given to you during meditation or even just a few moments for Spirit to gather close to you. If you feel cold spots or sensations during meditation, don’t stop…..just enjoy the moment. This is my favourite meditation channel on youtube.

3. You can also ask for guidance and help just before you go to sleep on the 30th, 31st or the 1st.  Think about a goal or plan which you have for 2016 or a problem that may stand in your way in achieving your dreams. Now call on the Angels, spirit guides and/or your spirit family e.g family you have in spirit. Ask them for clarity and guidance for a way forward. Pay attention to any messages, thoughts, images or dreams you may have that night.

4. Be Wishful but grateful. We are so focused on cosmic ordering and asking that we forget to say THANK YOU! Be grateful of everyday we wake up alive! I remember watching Dr Wayne Dyer’s the Shift a while back and wondered why he said “Thank You” the moment he woke up. It hit me later that he was saying thank you for another day of human life. It was more meaningful watching it again this year after his passing.  His words were so powerful and life changing but he remained humble and grateful. Do your wishlist for 2016 but add a gratitute list on the bottom for all the things you were thankful for in 2015. You can go out to the garden and burn it (safely) to send it off to the universe or leave it on your window. Or leave your list on an altar or a scared space. 

5. Welcome 2016 – Start your New Year first day with positive intend and in a positive manner. I know its difficult being positive if 2015 has been a dififcult and sad year. Put the intention out that you want to have a good year by being positive and keeping your mind clear from negativity. 

What not to do on New Year’s Day:

  • Try not to clean the house on Jan 1 – my mother always says its bad luck to clean the house — its like wiping the good luck away!
  • Avoid spending money – again my mother says you will be spending money all year. So the more money you can keep in your wallet today, the better for you financially.
  • Keep communication positive. Avoid difficult topics, arguments or negativity.

Happy New Year!

I hope 2016 brings you abundance in every way – love, prosperity, luck and peace. May it also bring you closer to your soul purpose 

Believe that 2016 will be FANTASTIC! 

Please let me know if you found this useful x I love feedback x